It’s been over a year for me and you. Our spark flamed up into this beautiful fire and now it’s burned out. All that’s left are a few embers waiting to spark again. I hope it’s just a phase and we can somehow find our way back. You’re everything I’ve ever hoped a significant other would be. You’re smart, funny, handsome, and believe me I could listen to your east coast accent for an eternity. I don’t want a goodbye. I just want a solution. I never imagined falling in love with you. I tried and tried to not let it happen. You are my first love. That will never change. I never imagined I would be here in love with someone who didnt know I loved them. I know you always keep your emotions locked up like I did. You are the first to break down all these insecurities and walls down and I love you even more for that. You deserve so much more than what I’ve given you. You work hard and still find time for me. All I can really do is just hope we can work this out.
5 Things They Don’t Teach you in Highschool:
1) You’re going to leave the house at 2AM, 16 with nothing in your pockets but 50 bucks and a bus ticket. It won’t feel real. You’re going to think you’re leaving, but you aren’t going anywhere.
2) Swallow your fucking pride and go back inside. Lock your bedroom door, put your hands over your ears, bring your knees to your chest and when you’re ready, let your walls disintegrate and the sadness flood in, because baby I promise you, you’ll feel better if you just let yourself drown. Even if it’s the third goddamn time that week.
3) He’s going to taste like Newports, Trident spearmint and desperation. You’re going to taste like Lime-a-Rita’s and anxiety. You will tell yourself you need this. But you don’t. I promise you. You don’t. You don’t.
4) You’re going to have girlfriends who fall for boys who treat them like absolute shit. Do not learn from them. If a boy calls you a bitch, spit in his face and leave.
5) Do it even if it’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do. Even if you’re still convinced that he was hiding galaxies beneath his skin. Because baby I promise you, he was the always dark night sky and you were always the full moon. No question bout’ it.
Meg Allen - Butch
BUTCH is a documentary portrait project and exploration of the butch aesthetic, identity and presentation of female masculinity as it stands in 2013-14. It is a celebration of those who choose to exist and identify outside of the binary; who still get he’d and she’d differently throughout the day; who get called-out in bathrooms and eyed suspiciously at the airport; who have invented names for themselves as parents because “Mom” nor “Dad” feels quite right; and who will generally expect that stare from the gender police trying to figure out if they are “a boy or a girl”. It is an homage to the bull-daggers and female husbands before me, and to the young studs, gender queers, and bois who continue to bloom into the present. (source)